Weddings at All Saints
A Guide for Couples and Families
Introduction
Warmest congratulations on your forthcoming wedding!
The Pastors at All Saints are delighted to conduct weddings for church members. The purpose of this guide is to provide some useful information to assist in planning the service. It is not exhaustive, but it does include important details not found in other wedding guides, particularly in relation to the Wedding Service that we use at All Saints.
The All Saints Wedding Service
In recent decades, various strange innovations have found their way into Christian worship. Wedding services have not been immune from these unfortunate developments. It has become common for well-meaning couples, wedding coordinators, and family members to propose various idiosyncratic changes to the traditional Wedding Service, including unsuitable musical items, additional ceremonies and liturgical elements, changes to the vows, readings from sources other than the Bible, additional speeches or other contributions from friends and family members, and so on. Sadly, many churches today routinely grant these requests.
The Wedding Service at All Saints does not contain such innovations. A wedding service is first and foremost an act of Christian Worship, conducted to the glory of God, containing solemn promises made in the presence of God, in which bride and groom receive the blessing of marriage as a gift from God. With this in mind, we follow a traditional, historically grounded, Biblically informed wedding liturgy, which exhibits an enduring dignity and beauty that has developed over many generations. Our commitment to this traditional form reflects the fact that marriage is itself a divinely ordained institution, not one invented by man. In marriage, husband and wife are joined together in a relationship that reflects the bond between our Lord Jesus Christ and his beloved bride, the church. The Wedding Service itself therefore should not capitulate to contemporary whims and fads, but rather should reflect God-given Biblical principles and time-honored practices.
Decisions to be made
There are of course still many decisions to make about the service itself. Apart from such important aesthetic matters as decorations, seating arrangements, dress, and so on, there are a number of important decisions to make about various elements of the service, such as the choice and number of hymns, the selection of Bible readings, and music. With all these details in place, we’re confident that you will be delighted by your rich, profound, and beautiful Wedding Service.
Outline of the Order of Service
The Order of Service should contain the following elements, in this order:
- Prelude
- Processional
- Introduction
- The Declarations
- Bible Reading(s)
- Homily
- Prayers
- [Lord’s Prayer, if desired]
- [Hymn, if desired]
- The Vows
- Recessional
Printing the Order of Service
The production and printing of the Order of Service is the responsibility of the families. You will of course want to identify a design that you like, and there are many professional designers and printers who can help you with this. You may also wish to include the names of the wedding party, details about the reception, and a thank you note to your friends and/or families.
Here’s a sample pdf of the full Order of Service, for your guidance:
We strongly suggest that you send us a copy of the proofs of the proposed Order of Service before you print them, so we can check that the details are correct.
Wedding Choreography
The wedding service involves a significant number of moving parts – including the entrance of the best man and groomsmen, the procession of the maid of honor and bridesmaids, the entrance of the bride, and more besides. Please do not attempt to plan these movements in advance, as they are constrained by the architecture of the building and the shape of the wedding service. In any case, there is no need to plan these details, as the Pastor will explain them during the rehearsal.
The Marriage
This section contains a fuller text of the central portion of the service found under the heading “The marriage” in the above Order of Service. This is the part of the service where the marriage actually takes place, and will be read the Pastor, with responses as appropriate. Words in bold type are spoken by someone other than the Minister, as indicated. Words in square brackets [like this] either give explanatory notes or are replaced by the names of the bride or groom, as appropriate.
Here’s a sample pdf of the Marriage liturgy, for your information. Please note that this level of detail should not be included in the printed order of worship:
FAQs
What is the cost for a wedding service at All Saints?
All Saints charges $500 to host a wedding. This includes the use of the sanctuary for the service, dressing rooms for the bridal party, and the use of the Fellowship Hall (if required) for a reception. The Pastors do not charge for conducting the wedding service.
Can we write our own vows?
No. We realized that this question has become increasingly common in recent years, and some churches do allow couples to write their own vows. This is most unfortunate, since it perpetuates a misunderstanding about the nature of marriage. Marriage is a gift from God, and receives its definition from the word of God. The church throughout the ages has developed time-honored, traditional vows that reflect this Biblical teaching, and this is reflected in the traditional vows we used at All Saints. We encourage couples to reflect on the Biblical teaching expressed in these vows as they prepare for married life.
Can we hold our reception in the Fellowship Hall?
Yes, and this is included in the cost noted above. However, there are numerous practical details associated with this; please speak to the church administrator for details.
When can we have access to the building?
Access can usually be arranged on the morning of the wedding. Arrangements will also need to be made for locking the building securely at the end of the day. Please speak to our church administrator for further details.
What arrangements can be made for music during the service?
We have a piano, and other acoustic instruments may also be used. If you wish to employ a accompanist, the church administrator can give details of pianists from the congregation at All Saints who may be willing to play for a small honorarium; alternatively, you may hire your own. The sanctuary sound system allows for voice amplification, but we do not have the facility to play pre-recorded music in the sanctuary.
Can we decorate the church with flower arrangements?
Yes. However, please note that no nails or other fixings that leave marks may be used, and existing church decorations may not be removed. Please speak with the church administrator for further details.
Can we play music during the reception?
Yes. However, please note that the sound system in the Fellowship Hall is extremely limited, so if you wish to play anything other than background music, you will need to make alternative arrangements for this.
May alcohol be consumed during the reception?
Yes. However, please note that alcohol may only be consumed in the Fellowship Hall, and only after the service. If you wish to serve alcohol during your reception, please speak to our church administrator for further details.
Can we throw confetti, rice, or flower petals?
Flowers, petals, or similar discreet decorations may be laid by the flower girls in the sanctuary prior to the arrival of the bride, and flowers or other biodegradable confetti may be thrown outside. No other confetti may be thrown inside the building. We have also been asked not to allow rice to be thrown, as apparently is presents a slip hazard, and may harm birds.
Next Steps
If you wish to explore further the details of holding your wedding service at All Saints, there are some practical matters to deal with. First, please contact our church administrator to determine whether the building will be available on the required date.
Second, once you’ve done this and are in communication with one of our Pastors, please fill in the questionnaire below, which will assist him in preparing for the wedding service.
Finally, we encourage you to remember that the wedding day is just the beginning of your new life together. As Pastors, it is our goal to encourage and support you as you seek to remain faithful to Christ in this new chapter of your lives. To this end, we have prepared a series of discussion questions entitled Preparing for Marriage, which we encourage you to talk about together over the coming weeks and months. Our hope is that this will help in your preparation for marriage by raising important topics for discussion. As your Pastors we would be delighted to meet with you and talk about these matters. Please don’t hesitate to contact us.